{the story of a girl}

Monday, October 31, 2005

{best witches}


One of my favorite holidays. Something about the change of season, the spooky costumes and pumpkins just make me smile. I'm dressed as a pretty funky witch, if I do say so myself. Just can't help...I love the evil costumes!

This past weekend was probably one of the biggest emotional rollercoasters I've been on in a long time. I found out that something that happened 10 years ago (and dramatically influenced my life) wasn't at all what I thought it was. Basically, without going into all the gory details, I thought a devastating breakup was because of me. That someone just walked out of my life because they were unhappy with my body (I was freshman and gaining that notorious 'freshman 15'). Come to find out Friday night that wasn't the case at all. There was MUCH more to the situation that was completely out of my control and had absolutely nothing at all to do with me. I'm trying to make it all make sense, but it will take some time.

I spent a couple of hours yesterday with JG in the hospital. She started to experience some contractions and was admitted to St. Joe's Saturday night. All seems to be well now, thank goodness. I'm anxious for LJG to arrive, but not this soon.

Thought of the day: You say I'm a witch like it's a BAD thing!

Friday, October 28, 2005

{diabolical, but cute}

Lately I've been accused of being a flirt, tease, devil, etc. What would EVER give anyone this idea? He-he. Okay, I admit it, I'm all three. But life is waaaay to short not to be, right? ;)

In other news, I have tickets to the ASU/Washington game tomorrow. Who on earth do I ask to go with? Can't decide. Want to have fun, get rowdy. Some people are just best left out of that aspect of my life. :)

WEEKEND! Freakin' finally! Need sleep. Lots of it. And Chinese food. Have a hankering for it lately.

Halloween is on Monday. Yea! Love Halloween. Got to buy me a pumpkin to carve...and then smash.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

{simple pleasures}

It's the simple things in life that please me most. Things like:

* Cuddling up underneath my demin duvet cover
* A Saturday with nothing to do but whatever sounds appealing
* Reading an entire book on a lazy Sunday afternoon
* A long phone conversation with a good friend
* A chicken salad from Costa Vida
* Finishing a gruelling work-out
* A clean, tidy apartment
* Burning a new CD of favorite songs
* Writing
* A new hoodie
* Purchasing something off my amazon.com wish list
* Good mail days
* GREAT hair days
* Taking long drives out to the lake
* Watching the sun set (or rise) over the Superstitions

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

{out of the past}

It seems as if my life lately is full of people from my past...or just THE past. Today, while running an errand at Fiesta Mall, I ran into C-Lo from "that one place". It was great to see and talk to her. Of course we exchanged cards and I hope to see her again soon. Then, as I'm leaving, I see my old crush, KS, roll up in his sweet little Mustang GT. My heart skipped a bit. Still cute. Still adorable. Still sooo not my type. Moving on.

Erin says that everyone comes into our lives for a reason. We may never know the reason...perhaps it has everything to do with the other person and nothing to do with us. But there is a rhyme and reason to everything.

I've been thinking about LA an awful lot lately. It seems as if each time I pull that box out of my mental closet I can understand it at little better, let more of it go. Though I know I will always think of him, I also know that I have let him go. And with that, I've let go of so much that's been weighing me down. When I read The Empty Seat now, I know who far I've come. When I drive through the desert now, it's not him I dream of and wish were sitting next to me.

I am determined to just live life. I am who I am. People can accept it or not, it's their choice. I am a work in progress. A book with a new page written everyday. I've let go of so much over the past seven months. Their is still a bit left to go and I'm sure that, in time, I can let go of it, too.

Thought of the day: Good girls keep journals, bad girls are too busy.

Thursday, October 20, 2005


My heart is breaking in a million tiny ways and a thousand times a day. If I don't think about him, I'm okay. I can function. Then something- a song, a voice, a memory- will pop into my mind and haunt me for the rest of the day. It doesn't help that I dream of him at night. I fall asleep, aching for the solace sleep can bring. But he is always there in the dark and light, falling into the shadows. The heartache is now just a dull ache, a void I sometimes feel in the pit of my stomache. I know he will leave and when he does it will tear me apart. But for now, he's here.

Friday, October 14, 2005

{it's friday??}

What the heck happened to this week? Insanity! It just began and now it's over. Whew!

Good week. Busy week. Bought the new Canon Digital Elph I've been wanting. Got a raise. Going to the AZ Science Center and the movies tomorrow. Teaching Gospel Doctrine on Sunday.

Weekend shopping list:
- Black belt
- Warm Sugar Vanilla Wallflower refill
- Amber Romance lotion and spray from Victoria's Secret
- Halloween 'jama bottoms from Old Navy
- Foundation from Clinique (and it's a gift week, bonus!)

I'm sad and happy all at once. It's been a rough week dealing with the changes that are coming, but I've decided to take each day as it comes and let the future work itself out. I know it will. I had a long talk with Erin Tuesday night (sometimes you just need that hour-long, best friend vent session) and she reminded me that everyone comes into our lives for a reason. I just need to have faith that either this will work out or someday I will know why "the face of all evil" crossed my path.

Monday, October 10, 2005

{wacky weekend}

A group of us crazy, insane people went to Safford, AZ this weekend to just hang out and go to the Graham County Fair. Good times. It always is when we get together. Crazy kids hiding under our table at the restaurant, ice cream at the car wash, jumping on the trampoline in the rain, mud bogging until we couldn't see, sinking the 4 Runner in a wash, county fair, throw-up rides, hot springs at midnight, trying to get seven people ready for church, and last, but certainly not least, it wouldn't be a weekend of fun without a run-in with the law.

With the exception of the weekend in Newport Beach, I've not had such a great time for a while. Whenever we all get together, fun abounds. As does chaos, blood and brusing, but it's all good. I felt a bit melancholy this weekend, despite the good times. Something inside of me knows it was the last time we would all be together like that. So much is changing. Our lives are pulling us in separate directions. A bit sad, but finding solace in knowing I'll always have the memories.

Thursday, October 06, 2005

{looking up}

Curly locks. Yeah, I've heard it about 7 times today and I've only been at work for 3 hours. What fun.

Today is a good day. I love my job. I love the environment I work in and the people I work with. Very uplifting for a change. The campus is beautiful and I just love being here.

Plans are on again for the weekend, just the way I want them.

Monday, October 03, 2005

{10 favorite movie lines}

EDITED: Since I have requests to name the movies, I will!

Meme challenge # 13- 10 favorite movie lines.

1) "I'm unloved, unappreciated, I only have one car." Girls Just Want To Have Fun
2) "If you're here then who's watching hell?" Dropping Off and Picking Up (ABC FAMILY)
3) "I am beautiful. Boy's will LOVE me." Hocus Pocus
4) "Why is the rum gone?" "One: It is a despicable drink that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels. And two: I've created a column of smoke that rises a thousand feet in the air. My father's ships will be combing the area. Do you think there is even a chance they won't see it?" ".... but why is the rum gone?" Pirates of the Carribbean
5) "Come in, and try not to ruin everything by being you." As Good As It Gets
6) "I feel the need. The need for speed." Top Gun
7) "What's you favorite scary movie?" "Showgirls. Absolutely terrifying." Scream 2
8) "Did you get that memo? I'll get you a copy of that memo." Office Space
9) "Just in case I'm not enough of a freak already let's add a tiara." The Princess Diaries
10) ""He didn't slam into you, he didn't bump you, he didn't nudge you. He rubbed you. And rubbin', son, is racin'." Days of Thunder


I splurged this weekend and bought the jewelry from Tiffany that was on my Ultimate Wish List. Yes, I'm in the Bad Girl Swirl.