{the story of a girl}

Monday, February 27, 2006

{tag}

Alright, Tam, I'll play this round:

1. What time did you get up this morning? 5:30am
2. Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Underworld: Evolution
4. What's your favorite TV show? 24, Grey's Anatomy and X-Files
5. What's your favorite cuisine? Italian
6. What's your favorite CD at the moment? Linkin Park
7. What kind of car do you drive? VW Jetta
8. Favorite clothing? Hoodies, jeans and flip-flops
9. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? BELIZE
10. Favorite brand of clothing? Ann Taylor
11. What was your most memorable birthday? 21
12. Where were you born? Utah
13. Favorite sport to watch? Hockey
14. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you? Hell yes
15. Are you a daredevil? Absolutely
16. How do you release anger? kickboxing
17. Where is your second home? ASU or the Kool Kid Klubhouse
18. Favorite Movies? Black Hawk Down, Practical Magic, The Village
19. What are your nicknames? Linds, pumpkin, Intergalactic Princess
20. What is your favorite ice cream flavor? Mint Chocolate Chip
21. What are your favorite colors? Blue, black, silver
22. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? My weight
23. What color pants are you wearing? I'M NOT WEARING PANTS
24. What are you listening to right now? Streaming alternative music from the internet
25. If you were a CRAYON what color would you be? Purple
26. Favorite Drink? Dr. Pepper or, since I'm quitting DP, Starbucks Strawberries n' Creme Fraps
27. Do you wear contacts? Always
28. Scary Movies or Happy Endings? Scary Movies
29. Summer or winter? Summer
30. Hugs OR Kisses? Long, slow, deep, soft wet kisses that last three days
31. What is Your Favorite Dessert? Tiramisu
32. What Book(s) are you reading? Spilling Open, Wicked
33. Favorite Smells? Orange blossoms, rain, fresh cut grass, really nice smelling guys
34. Rolling Stones or Beatles? Beatles (late stuff)
35. What's the furthest you've been from home? Eastern Europe

{stupid girl}

Lately I've been experiencing these twisted moments of anger and rudeness. I don't mean to be rude. I don't mean to lash out at others and hurt them. But I do, almost before I know it. Last night I was incredibly mean to a friend and I know I offended him. I took full responsibility for my words and actions and apologized. He didn't seem very willing to accept my apology. That stung. I suppose I expect people to forgive me instantaneously, and that just does not happen.

Why am I so inconsiderate at times? Why do I hurt others? What can I do to stop? These are the questions that have been rolling around in my little brain since last night. As macabre as it may seem, I almost wish I could go back to right after L's accident. I felt so raw and vulnerable then. I needed people close to me and let them in. I was soft around the edges; kinder, more considerate. It seems as if, as time heals, my heart also seems to be sealing shut again. I don't want that. I want to be open and loving. I want to give of myself and make others feel good about themselves.

But how?

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

{reminiscing}

Something about this time of year makes me take a stroll down memory lane. It was around this time of year that I had the fling with the frat boy, met LA and fell for him...hard, went on my last date with JS (aw...high school sweethearts), took my first real "college" trip to UNM to visit SB, went to LA on a theater trip, went to San Deigo to tour the temple, went to Snowflake to tour the temple, bought my beloved Jetta, met the man who turned my world upside down last year, became friends with ED, went on my first camping trip with "the crew".

When I get like this, I love to delve into old pictures and music, reliving the memories. I love it. It reminds me of all the good times I've had, all the pain I've endured and all that I still have to look forward to.

The next emotion to hit, I predict, will be SPRING FEVER!!!

Monday, February 20, 2006

{feeling good}

Considering I'm going on only four hours of sleep when I generally require at least eight, I'm feeling pretty darn good. I guess that's what a good weekend of friends, food, fun, shopping, e-brakes, getting stunned with a stun gun and eating ice cream will do to a girl. Plus, I threw off crutch and compromise and flirted my little heart out...with pretty decent results.

Other random enticings:

* I watched season 1 of Grey's Anatomy, my new favorite TV show. I'm seriously in love with McDreamy. Num.
* I got my new contacts (yea!) so my glasses are now banished to the bathroom cabinet.
* I found my favorite lotion (that has been discontinued for a couple of years) for $1 bottle at Big Lots.
* ACTUALLY made my bed...twice!

Monday, February 13, 2006

{inconsequential ramblings}

- I went to the desert and blew stuff up this weekend. At midnight. It was weird and yet, oddly fun.

- Several weeks ago, while shopping at Barnes & Noble, a book caught my attention. It was in the Young Adult section and had two white hands holding an apple. I picked it up to read the cover but was quickly distracted and placed it back on the shelf. Last week I was at Border's and saw the same book. I couldn't resist it this time. I devoured the book in a day (it was 500 pages) and have since re-read it. The books is Twilight by Stephenie Meyer. I adore this book. The characters are so thoroughly developed and real, it amazes me. I think I might even have a small crush Edward. Thank goodness there are going to be sequels.

- I've become addicted to selling books on amazon.com. I've made $150.00 in the past week. Woo-hoo!

- Dell FINALLY replaced my Pocket DJ and I'm back in business.

- New CD's this week (for me, anyway): Evanescence and My Chemical Romance

- New DVD's this week: Tim Burton's Corpse Bride and Just Like Heaven

Thursday, February 02, 2006

{challenge}

1. Where were you born? Utah
2. Name something you've always wanted to do. Skydive
3. What do you want to be when you grow up? A journalist or event planner
4. What's the number one problem we face in the world today? ME! Bwhahahaha
5. If you could change the world, what would you do? Make everyone more accepting of others
6. What's the most dangerous thing you've ever done? Bungee jumped or cliff dived
7. Favorite word? Twiterpaited